so much has happened.
dreadful's the word;
weary's the feeling.

all these trouble caused me to be jilted to my senses.if none of these problems had appeared, i wouldnt be as sensible now.it took me so long to finally realise what a fool i have been.plain stupid.well, after twirling such a big round, i've found my way back on track at last.it really set me thinking what i've been doing and turning into for the past ten months or so.before i got to know you, i wasnt like this.

i thought i could change you into a better person.the timw spent, the effort put in, the love, care and concern i gave to you - unappreciated.

i treated you the best i could.when everyone else had to look at you with different eyes, when they all thought you were a good-for-nothing jerk, i was there to defend you.when people talked behind your back, i stood up for you.no matter how much you hurt me, i didnt give up on you.i didnt look down on you at all despite the fact that you do nothing but idle around.

everything i gave to you, everything i sacrificed, what do i get at the end of it?
broken friendships, wasted time and an almost destroyed future.

was it worth giving up all these things?
i used to say 'yes', but now when i look back, its a big nono.
i realise you're not worth it.

i loved you from the bottom of my heart, and yet you could still doubt me.you dont even have the basic trust in me.you claim your friends dont like me, that's why you cannot be with me.but hey, my friends dont like you too.
did it affect the way i felt about you?
nope, not even a single bit.
see? thats just one of the countless differences we have.
we're from two entirely different worlds, thats why we cannot get along well.
according to what you always say; you love me.
i wont doubt you at all, because everyone has different ways of expressing themselves.

&for you, maybe the way you love me is the kind that i cannot accept.what appears to be your "true feelings" for me is selfish.we cant go on like this, i cant carry on too.

i should have come to my senses earlier, but at least i woke up.i know whats important and whats not.you're not the MIP in my life anymore, and im happy to say that.from now on, anything you do does not concern me.i cant control the way you wanna live your life.i have no say because to you i am just a nobody.

a nobody.
this is something that im gonna find it hard to accept.

its true, what the other say.many people dont like me now cos of what happened.so what? none of you or your friends can bother.i may have a few friends only, compared to you who has ALOT more than me, but i can gladly say that almost all my friends are true to me.i cant say the same thing about you, and you know it better then anyone else.is there anyone you can count on when you're in need? i think you have the answer aye?

and why did all these happen?
its cos i loved you.
big mistake.

what's mine will always be mine.if we're really meant to be, then love will find its way home one day.(which i honestly dont think we're made for each other)

and oh yeah.i lost my phone.
i think you know about it yah?
after this incident, i spent alot of time thinking and reflecting.
somethings are meant to be forgotten.
its all predestined for that person to steal my phone,
and its fated for our stuff in the phone to be lost.
God's giving me a red light to you.
i have to accept this arrangement, whether i like it or not.
its all clear for me to see now.

im better off without you,
and you're better off without me also.
so yeapyeapps, byebye gavin.


and you know what?
i think its not that im not good enough for you.
its you who doesnt deserve to be with me.(:


PEOPLE;
Annabelle (CATCH ME WHEN I FALL)
Dion
Terence
Yongsheng
Prasad
Cheecheng
Shirlene
Sandra
Lina
Amanda.S
Rachel
Xinmin
Heather
Kaiwen
Noren
Yishih
Gillian
Shermaine
Jacqueline(yeap, that one day:D)
Berlinda
Wenda
Benjamin
Mr Lee
& a few others out there..

hey dearies.thank you so so much for being there for me whenever i need you.
i know that when im in any kind of trouble of difficult situation, i can count on ya'all.
i'll be there anytime too.thanks thanks thanks a million :P


and most importantly, my dear kohliangcai,
im very happy to know that your shoulders are there.heh!
thanks alot for your support and encouragement all these while.
although you dont really show it out,
i know how much you care.
so really, thank you.(:
dont smile hor!
you think funny uh?



when a vase breaks, no matter how hard you try to fix and patch up the broken pieces, the cracks will remain there forever...

QUEEN.

Brenda Yap.
21o892
I ♥ to eat.

"Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know." - Jeremiah 3:3


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